Do Other People's Opinions Really Define Us?
- Sally Cross
- Nov 18, 2024
- 2 min read
By Sally Cross, Therapeutic Life & Relationship Coach
for the Midlife & Senior Years, at Natural Change Coaching.
We may sometimes think about how others see us. We may be curious about the opinions formed by others, how our friends and peers see us, and how these views may shape the way we see ourselves. But how much power do these outside opinions really hold for us? Are they just soft whispers in our minds, or do they truly influence our self-view?
External Opinions
Humans thrive on connection. We naturally seek approval and acceptance from those around us. Compliments can boost our self-esteem, while harsh comments can leave emotional scars that take time to heal.
Sadly a single negative comment may have a larger psychological impact on us than several positive ones. It may take up to five positive remarks to outweigh one negative. Thus, while we may be influenced by what others say, it is crucial to remember that those words do not define who we are. A hurtful critique should not overshadow the many supportive praises we receive. When examining feedback, consider the source and intent. Is the feedback aimed at helping, or is it more about the critic's own personal struggles?
Self-Perception
How we see ourselves often comes from a mix of external viewpoints and our own perceptions. As we navigate our lives, we collect a variety of opinions. However, our most enduring beliefs are often based on our personal reflections.
To build a positive self-image, nurture a kind inner voice, be kinder to self.
Consider incorporating daily affirmations, or reminders of your accomplishments, or your unique positive traits. For example, listing three things you did well each week can strengthen your self-esteem and appreciation of your own self-worth.
Honesty
Honesty can be tough. Sometimes, the truths we hear from others can be hard to swallow. Nevertheless, honest feedback, even when uncomfortable, can lead us to personal growth and trust. The key is to differentiate between what is valuable advice, what is helpful constructive criticism, and what is criticism that serves no purpose.
Letting Go of Control
One of the realities to face is that we cannot manage how others view us. It is out of our control. Constantly trying to win approval can lead to unhappiness, stress and exhaustion.
Authenticity is more valuable to you and others than any effort to appear perfect. After all no-one is perfect!
A Personal Growth Journey
Always remember that we hold the power to define our own self-worth. When we accept ourselves fully for who we are, prioritise self-love and embrace authenticity, we can become a more confident version of ourselves, one that shines brightly, no matter what others may or may not say.
If you would like support on your personal growth journey; to feel stronger, confident, build resilience, believe in yourself, feel empowered, maybe I can help you achieve this..
Comments