“Is This It?” – When the Life You Built Feels Too Small

By Sally Cross, Intimacy & Relationship Coach, Therapeutic Coach & Author

She’s got the job. The home. The partner. The kids are (mostly) grown.

She’s ticked all the boxes she was told would bring happiness.

And yet…

There’s a quiet ache in the background.

A dull hum of dissatisfaction.

A whisper she can’t quite ignore that says:

“Is this it?”

If this question has been dancing in your mind lately, you’re not alone.

In fact, for many women, this moment of inner pause is one of the most defining and sacred turning points of midlife.

Though it often doesn’t feel sacred at all, and can actually feel a bit scary...

There was a time in my early 50’s, when I asked myself that question “Is this it?”.

It was a pivotal point in my life.

A point at which I realised I needed to make some changes.

The Midlife Malaise:

It’s not that anything is dramatically wrong.

It’s more that something’s… missing.

You might feel ungrateful or guilty for even thinking it.

“I should be happy. I’ve got so much to be thankful for.”

But there’s a difference between surviving and feeling truly alive.

And midlife often strips away the outer noise long enough for that deeper question to be heard:

“Who am I now?”

It’s not selfish.

It’s not a midlife crisis.

It’s a midlife awakening.

 The Invitation Hidden Inside the Ache:

When life starts to feel a little too tight, like being a butterfly still stuck in her cocoon, it’s not a failure.

It’s growth.

The roles you once played with passion may no longer light you up.

The rhythms that sustained you might now feel draining.

Even your desires, sexual, creative, and emotional, might be shifting shape.

This can feel disorienting, even frightening.

But what if this isn’t the end of something…

What if it’s a new beginning?

A return to your needs.

Your body.

Your pleasure.

Your voice.

Your truth.

 She Rises… Quietly At First:

You may not feel ready. You may not know what comes next.

But something inside you is already stirring.

Maybe you’ve felt it in a deep sigh while doing the dishes.

Or a flash of irritation when everyone expects you to keep holding it all together.

Or in that longing glance out the window… wondering what’s out there, waiting.

This stage of life, this sacred reckoning, is not about running away.

It’s about coming home to yourself.

Not the self you were told to be.

But the woman you were always meant to become.

 Just Begin by Listening:

If the question “Is this it?” has been whispering through your days, you don’t have to rush for an answer.

Just… listen.

That whisper is not your failure.

It’s your invitation.

To rise.

To reclaim.

To rediscover.

And oh…

She will rise.

 I’m excited to announce that this blog is part of the pre-launch series for my upcoming book, She Rises — a soulful guide for midlife women ready to reconnect with their desires, their truth, and their untamed power. More details coming very soon…

Sally x

www.sallycross.com